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The Independent Insurgency
Jun. 13th, 2008
10:18 am - Office Quote of the Day, June 13
"Here's the thing about managers and their employees.... A good manager says, 'Hey--it's my birthday. Celebrate me.' A great manager says, "Hey--it's my birthday. Celebrate yourselves." Because you're the ones who made me great." -- Michael
Jun. 12th, 2008
09:58 am - Office Quote of the Day, June 11
"Usually when we talk about sex harassment, that's the day everyone harasses me. As a joke." -- Pam
Jun. 10th, 2008
11:12 am - Office quote of the day for June 10
We've got an uncommonly good streak lately:
"There are some things a boss can't share with his employees. His salary--that would just depress them. His bed." -- Michael
Jun. 9th, 2008
10:13 am - Office Quotes of the Day
Twofer today:
Saturday/Sunday, June 7/8:
"I'm going to be reading their emails. Email surveillance. All the big companies do it. Increases efficiency. Increases productivity. It is a necessary evil. Well, not really evil. it is a necessary good thing." -- Michael
Monday, June 9:
"There's nothing better than a beautiful day at the beach, filled with sun, surf, and diligent note-taking." -- Pam
May. 29th, 2008
08:38 am - Office Quote of the Day for Thursday, May 29
From The Office page-a-day calendar:
"Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." -- Michael
May. 13th, 2008
08:51 am - Office Quote of the Day for Tuesday, May 13
From my quote-a-day calendar for the American version of The Office. This is a good one.
"My perfect date? I take the girl out for a nice dinner. She looks stunning. But then, some guy tries to hit on her . . . so I grab him and throw him into a jukebox. But the other ninja has a knife . . . so I take her home. . . . As I kiss her goodnight, I hear something in the leaves, and I flip her around. She gets a poison arrow right in the back. . . ." -- Dwight
May. 7th, 2008
10:38 am - Office Quote of the Day for Wednesday, May 7, 2008
From my Quote-A-Day calendar for 2008 for the American version of The Office:
"If I could menstruate, I wouldn't have to deal with idiotic calendars anymore. I'd be able to just countdown from my previous cycle. Women don't know how easy they've got it."
-- Dwight
Apr. 25th, 2008
01:18 pm - Office Quote of the Day for Friday, April 25.
From my Office quote-a-day calendar:
"I never smile if I can help it. Showing your teeth is a submission signal in primates. When someone smiles at me, all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life." -- Dwight
Apr. 15th, 2008
09:40 am - Office Quote of the Day
From my desk calendar for April 15. (Tax day! I just got the meta-joke.)
"We are doing this for charity . . . I consider myself a great philanderer . . . and I know at the end of the day I can look in the mirror and say, 'Michael, tonight because of you some little kid in the Congo has a belly full of rice this evening.' Plus, it's tax deductible."
-- Michael
Apr. 11th, 2008
02:34 pm - The Office quote of the day
This one's going out to Judd in honor of his karate. From my desk calendar, for Saturday/Sunday April 12/13:
"When I die I want to be frozen. And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever, because I will have used that time to figure out exactly why I died and what moves I could have used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in."
-- Dwight